Strange Adventures of the New Christines
by Akimi Kono
Summary: -new summary- Three teens find their way into Erik's world .. and get lost. Though two hate PoTO, which one will win Erik's heart? OOCness, baby! Dedicated to Haruto Kawano & Shounen Ai!
1. It is just not my luck! GO FOR ME!

6/18/10

Keep in mind I've only read the first two chapters so far, so I have no idea what I'm talking about. Haha. Please enjoy..

Catlin (cat-LYN) and Anna and perhaps a Briana were sitting on a couch, bored out of their wits. There was nothing to do in this BORING house. Finally Anna let out a long sigh and sat up from her slouched position.

"Let's do something fun."

"Something inexpensive," Catlin chimed in, afraid that "fun" was pretty much chained to "money". In Anna's case, it was. The redhead threw herself back onto the couch and groaned.

"Whatever! We weren't gonna make YOU pay!"

"Yes, you were indeed planning on making me pay for a portion of this so called 'fun' activity, in which would most likely involve costumes."

Briana and Anna were silent before bursting out in laughter. Catlin was confused.

"What's so funny?" she asked cluelessly.

"You! You're funny. Oh, you joker, you ..." Anna said, wiping an imaginary tear from her eye. She giggled, "You're too funny."

Catlin did not laugh. She did not even crack a smile. She did not get why she was so funny. "Um..then let's .. sing ... LET'S LISTEN TO THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA CD!"

"You don't even have it," Anna said boredly.

"Aha, that's what you think .. but ... " the brunette pulled out a CD from behind her back and waved it in the younger girl's face. "I do!"

"Um." Anna stared at the cover. "That's my Hawk Nelson is My Friend CD."

"Once again, that's what you think but I ... " she turned away dramatically and held the CD to her chest, "I threw away that old fuddy-duddy CD and replaced it with mine .. "

"What."

"... a while ago."

"WHAATT!"

Anna jumped to her feet, "You mean that's the reason Jason Dunn is sounding like some strange disfigured hermit with an echoey voice and some high-pitched lady who's younger than Briana!"

"... " Catlin gazed towards the wall, " ... yes." This was starting to feel like a Lifetime Movie.

"How .. how could you do this to me? You're .. you're supposed to be my sister."

"... " Catlin turned quickly, her hair swooshing behind her like in many a movie. "I AM your sister!"

"NOOO!"

Briana watched this spectacle with slight amusement and slight confusion. She was silent as Anna fell onto the couch and bounced back off onto the ground.

"Ow."

Catlin took this opportunity to dash to the television on the wooden vanity and turned it on. She flipped it to it's DVD setting and plugged in the machine. She waited until it finally started up before turning on the DVD player and opening it. She placed the CD in and closed it. It was a process that took forever. Finally the screen came up and she pressed "Play". The Overture began so, though her fragile and perhaps glass heart was beating in a strange and uneven manner, she changed it to a different song. The truth was, she had only listened to the CD about one or two times and didn't know the names of the songs.

Whichever song it was, it began to play a beautiful melody. She swayed slowly, closing her eyes and sighing softly. She could just imagine the tall and mysterious Phantom standing beside her. Perhaps in front of her. With his back turned? She couldn't tell.

"NO!" She heard someone jump onto the ground and come towards her. "This song is EVILLL!"

Catlin opened her eyes and turned around just in time to see Anna swipe the CD case out of her hands, "I WILL PUT AN END TO THIS!" The brunette was unsure of what the CD case would do, considering it wasn't even the right one.

"Wait. I think I like this song," Briana began. The two girls looked at her; she giggled and snorted, "I'm joking." With a serious look and a monotone voice, she said, "I hate Phantom of the Opera."

"Oh." Catlin said, placing her hands over her glass heart. "I think my heart's breaking. Ah." She fell to the ground sadly. "This is too bad."

"Sucky way to tell her, Bri." Anna said, stifling her own laughter.

"Sorry."

A deep echoing voice, um, echoed around the room causing all three girls' heads to snap towards the DVD player. Well, the TV actually, and only two of them. Briana and Anna stared at the TV while Catlin was mending her heart with mental surgical tape and gauze. "Ah."

Finally the airhead looked over towards the TV to see that instead of the blue DVD logo it was a long hallway. She was silent, at a loss for words. What was this? A joke? She stood up and stared at the screen; was it a picture? She went to touch it but Anna shrieked.

"Don't! It could be like on Van Helsing!"

"Um," Briana began, "or it could be like on Phantom of the Opera?"

"Oh, yeah. Haha. Sorry."

The three girls blinked in unison and stared in silence. Finally Catlin's empty mind clicked and her face brightened. "HOLY TOLEDO! I'M GOIN' IN!"

Anna grabbed her around the wait, "No you ain't!"

"But! I! Must!" The girl tried to squirm out of the tight grip but it was nearly impossible. Actually, if it was "nearly" then she would have been able to do it, but with great difficulty. Ergo, it _was_ impossible. For her at least. Not to get technical or anything ..

"Oh! Catlin! Don't you have some sort of list to do in your room!"

They looked over at Briana.

"How do you know about that...?" Anna asked slowly.

The girl smiled sheepishly. "I, uh, might have helped write it?"

"You did NOT!" Anna gasped, letting go of the choking brunette.

"I did."

"You DID!" Her eyes widened, "KIK!"

"What?"

"Kik .. um, like the wrong say to say lol."

" ... " Catlin took this opportunity to run to her room, grab the notebook on her dresser and reappear in the living room before anyone noticed she was gone. But then again she could have been gone for the rest of the night and no one would notice until perhaps the next week. She could have been dead by then; or worse - hungry.

"All right. I'm bored with this already. Let's go."

"Okay."

Briana and Catlin were ready to go but Anna wasn't. The two had to grab onto her arms and haul her over to the TV.

"Wait, isn't this supposed to be a mirror?" Catlin asked as she shoved the redhead towards the television.

"What? You don't know?" she shrieked. Catlin laughed. Maniacally.

"Don't worry. Be happy. BEEE HAPPPYYY."

"OKAY. I'M GETTIN' BORED OVA' HERE, CATLIN." Briana whined (not that she's whiny).

"Okay. On three."

"One."

"Two."

"Three - Wait, nooo!" Anna cried.

"There's Kisame on the other side." Briana said.

"OH! KISAME! HONEY, WAIT FOR ME!" Anna said and leapt through the TV (KIK!). Catlin was silent, staring.

"That worked?"

"What? Kisame? Of course."

"No. The TV."

"You didn't know?"

"Okay, time for Erik. This is getting too long for a one-shot."

"Yeah."

"In you go."

"What?"

Catlin grabbed her friend and threw her through the glass. "Glad that one worked too .. heh .. now ... for me .. hopefully I can .. find love .. and .. peace .. ah.. " She stepped forward and closed her eyes. She was ready for this! She was! Inhaling deeply she smiled and stepped forward into .. the TV. She fell back and hit the ground. "Ow! What? NOO!"

Ah. The luck of her ...

**on the other side of the TV**

"Um. Where's Catlin?" came an echoing voice (aka Anna).

"AIYYEEE!"

"AUUGHHH!"

Both girls screamed at each other, frightened. Finally they calmed down enough to find each other and breathe a sigh of relief.

"Now. Um. Where IS Catlin?"

"Wait, what? She's not here?"

" ... so ..we're stuck here ... " Anna began slowly.

" ... without her?"

" ... CATLIN! YOU BOOGER-BRAIN! YOU LEFT ME HERE WITH BRIANA - not that that's a bad thing," (Briana smiled half-heartedly at this), " - BUT YOU MEANIE! I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE WITH HER!"

"Hey!"

"What are you two doing here?"

The voice was deep.

Both girls clung to each other and turned around, screaming in fear. "IT'S A ZOMBIE!"

" ... " the voice did not reply. Anna could see the faint outline of a man. She inhaled.

"Oh. You're the strange man my sister likes! Edward, right?"

"Phantom."

"Oh, wait, wait, wait. Edmund! Yeah? Yeah."

"Phantom."

"No, no, it's .. it's .. "

"Phantom."

"Wait, you're a Phantom - it's .. Leslie! HAHA! YEAH! THAT'S IT! LESLIE!"

" ... Erik."

"Huh? Your name's Erik? OoooOOOoOoOoooOOOoOoOOo."

"Is that bad?" Briana asked, suddenly forgetting her irrational fear.

"I dunno," Anna shrugged.

" ... "

The girls looked back at the man. He quickly turned and disappeared with a swooshy-ness motion of his cape.

"Aw, man. NOW how are we going to get out of here?"

"Jerk."

"Pfft, whatever ... " Anna shook her head, "Let's find Cat."

"Yeah. ... wait, how do we do that?"

"I thought you knew."

" ... DANG IT!"

Briana and Anna let out grunts and groans, frustrated with it all. Stupid Catlin had to play her stupid CD and get them stupid stuck in that stupid place ...

"CURSE YOU CATLIN!" Anna's voice echoed down the empty hall. "I WILL GET YOOUU!"

"If the Phantom doesn't get you first," Briana said, half joking. As soon as she said that, both fell silent. They were scared now. Goosebumps ran up their arms.

"Why'd you have to say that, Briana?" Anna hissed in a low voice.

"Sorry. I thought it'd be funny."

Anna smacked Bri's head.

"Ow!"

"Yeah, well it ain't funny is it?"

"I'm sorry!"

"Let's just find a way out of here ... " Anna turned to the wall. "Maybe we ... can get back the way we came! Let's find a TV."

" ... uh, 1900s?"

"1800s... "

"1700s .. "

"Dangit. No TV."

"Ah, ah."

"Aha! The wall!"

"Wait, I don't think that'll work - "

"Just shush 'n' stand back, Briana!" Anna stepped back and geared up.

"I don't think that's a good idea - "

"SHUSH!" Anna closed her eyes and inhaled. " ... I am .. concentrating ... "

"Uh.."

Opening her eyes, she took off towards the wall. "TO HOOMMMMEEE!"

Needless to say the connection of body to wall did not really work. If you were to bet on Anna gettin' back to home, you were wrong. Dead wrong. You loser. Why'd you even think she'd win? Psh.

Anna fell back and screamed, "WHY DIDN'T IT WORK!"

Briana knelt down. "Do you need ice?"

"Yeah, it's just in the kitche ... " She moaned, crying. "Briiiaaannnnaa.."

"What?"

"Why didn't you talk me out of it!"

"I tried to."

"You tried to!"

"Yes."

"Well, did you succeed!"

"No."

"NO! NOO? Is that all you can say!"

"No - "

"Shush, I'm talking. I think I broke my arm."

" ... " Briana punched Anna in the pained arm, causing her to scream. "Is it broken?"

"If it wasn't, it is now!"

The two girls sat in the silent, damp hallway. They said nothing, trying to think of what to do to get back to home. They could care less about Catlin and getting her here, to her dream home.

So it was true. They were stuck there. Perhaps forever. On the other side of the TV. Could someone see them? It was a strange thing to think about. Being on a TV show ... but they weren't. Trapped with the Phantom .. in a hallway ... without light .. Ah..

**on the other other side of the TV, aka the original side**

Catlin sat on the ground, nursing her bruised face. She sighed sadly. "Ah, I guess it was never meant to be .. I guess Briana and Anna were supposed to be the Angels of Music ... not me ... " She sighed again and stared down at the ground. "Ahh, aha, ah."

She removed her hand from her nose to see blood drip down between her fingers. Nosebleed. "Darn ... " she said in a soft voice. Soon more blood leaked out onto the ground. "Noo .. this is champagne-colored carpet."

It seemed her nosebleed didn't really care.

"Ah."

Curse Erik and his singing voice. Curse him opening the portal into his world. Curse Anna for going first for Kisame. Curse Briana for going second. Curse herself for not going in. Curse The Phantom of the Opera. Curse her imagination - if this was all a dream (then there would be no need for cursing, or the tissue box which she was desperately trying to find). Curse it all!

Ah. Irony.

Life sucked sometimes.

**end of part one**


	2. Waitasec, Le Fop is not on my list! NOO!

6/21/10 - 6/25/10

Time for part two. Yay ... simple person. Let's Blow Away. :) Once again, this is dedicated to good friends. Haruto Kawano & Shounen Ai. Can you guess who is who in my story? Hey. I like this song. :) All Around Me by Flyleaf is playing on KTV ... (: yey. Music video!

Time for bashing, yes?

**beginning of part two**

Briana and Anna made their way down the dark hallways of the .. place, unsure of where they were exactly. To Anna it seemed that it was Dracula's castle, though she wasn't sure because she hadn't read the book; but Catlin had. Kind of. She had read the first ten pages. But it was close enough to knowing exactly what happened, right?

"I'm tiiiirrreeed," Anna began, whining loudly. Her voice echoed down the hallway.

"Quiet," Briana hissed, "He could hear us." That immediately shut her up. But she found another way to complain. She held her hurting arm and gritted her teeth.

"Briana," she said in a low voice, "my arm hurts."

"Maybe you shouldn't have acted stupid."

"You think I'm stupid!"

"Shush, your voice is rising ... "

"Hmph."

They walked in silence for a little while before coming to a dead end.

"BRRRIIIIANNNNAAA!"

"I didn't do it!"

"I don't care! I'm blamin' you!"

"That's not nice!"

"I don't really care about that either!"

As the two bickered like underage school children trapped in a maze of dark walls and ill-lit corridors, there came a knocking sound that echoed behind them. They fell silent and turned to look down into the black that seemed to be swirling towards them. The knocking became louder and paired up with a scraping sound that seemed to belong to Freddie Krueger.

The two clunged to each other like pieces of rice and squealed.

"Get away from me!"

"NOO!"

They seemed to be channeling both Spongebob in the episode "Graveyard Shift" and Nancy Travis as Joyce Reardon in "Rose Red" near the end of the movie. Their screams got louder as the noise came closer. Finally it seemed to be right in front of them; as well as beside them and behind them. It was closing in ... closer and closer and closer ...

"AUUGH - " Anna began but stopped shortly and stared in unamusement forward. Briana continued to scream until the redhead pinched her arm; she pulled her hand away and frowned, "Ow."

Her face seemed to read, "What was that for?"

"LOOK."

"No," the dark girl said, staring, wide-eyed, at her friend. "I'm too scared."

"Weenie."

"What!"

"Baby. Cry baby."

"I-I'm not a - "

"Then look."

Briana gripped onto Anna's arms tightly and squinted her eyes, turning her head slowly. When she saw the thing that had made the noise she sighed and dropped her hands.

"A cat?"

"Yah," Anna replied almost angrily.

The two sighed and shook their heads. The elder (now that makes it sound like she's ancient, and she's not!) began to laugh a bit.

"Heh. I feel silly."

"Yeah, well I don't." Anna started, "I'm gonna kick that cat in the pants."

"Don't!" Briana cried, grabbing her by the uninjured arm, "That's silly."

"Why? How?"

"Cats don't wear pants," Briana said and began giggling at her own joke.

" ... I don't get it."

The other sighed, "Okay, Anna, let's just find another way out of her - "

"What?"

Briana stared in silence towards the black behind the cat. Anna glanced over, feeling afraid. "What .. what's wrong?"

"I hear something," she said in a low voice, tightly gripping onto Anna's upper arm. "Something close ... "

Indeed, soon after she said that there came the pattering of footsteps and then a scraping. It came up close ... until there was the faint outline of a man in front of them. Briana screamed.

"IT'S THE STRANGLER!"

"DON'T WORRY! I'LL GET HIM!" Anna screamed, though she wasn't quite sure she could get over her fear, and started to gear up her kicking leg.

The man quickly stepped into the dim light that leaked into the hall. His swooshy hair and moustache were the first things Anna noticed.

"OHMIGOSH."

"What?" Briana shouted, afraid of the sudden noise.

"IT'S RAOUL."

The man raised an eyebrow and stared at the redhead, "Pardon; have we met?"

"Who's Pardon?" Anna asked, staring at him seriously. He blinked.

" ... I must go."

"Go where? It's a dead end! The only way out of here would be the way you came, bub."

"Who is Bub?"

Anna facepalmed. "Let's just get outta here!"

"Yes! ..R-Right! This way!" The man ran towards them. They squealed and separated just in time to see him smack into the wall. He fell onto his back, clutching his face in his hands.

"I told you - it's a dead end." the redhead replied in an unforgiving tone.

The, ahem, man sat up and let out a groan. He removed his hands from his face. He wasn't bleeding. Which was good. Better than the luck of Catlin. (Yeah, you forgot about her didn't you? I did too ... )

He quickly jumped to his feet, as he was a sailor, and turned on his heels to face the young ladies. He stood up straight and puffed out his, um, chest?

"You do not seem to think that I am capable of knowing this; but I am to test the knowledge of myself - and of the Phantom! He thinks these walls can hold me, but they .. they can not!" He kicked the walls with his foot and immediately hugged it to his chest, jumping up and down.

Anna was silent, staring at the person. "Ah; my sister lied. You DON'T look like Mr. Toomey. I'M DISAPPOINTED!"

He turned to her. "Whom?"

"Mr. Toomey."

He was silent. Staring.

"He's from a movie."

"A moo-vee?"

Anna snorted. "YEAH, a moo-vee." She began giggling. Briana stared in silence. She wasn't sure what was so funny. It was, what they called, her "Catlin moment".

"Okay, Rupert, show us the way out of here."

"Raoul."

"Whatever Ronald."

"I-I thought you said it was Raoul?" Briana asked, " ... and you said it like you knew him?"

Anna turned to her. "Don't ever assume the worst."

"What?"

"Worst .. w-u-r-s-t. Haha. Like sausage? HAHAHA! I'M SO FUNNY!" No one said anything. She sighed and closed her eyes. "Can we please just get outta here?" She paused quickly, throwing her hands up, "Wait!"

They waited.

" ... Rupert was from The Ruby Ring (which was on today, June 22nd)!"

" ... "

" ... "

"... you're useless!"

"I'm sorry - "

"Not you, Bri. HIM."

"I apologize - "

"Too late."

"Um, well, Anna ... uh ... Raoul ..?"

He nodded.

" .. c-can we PLEASE try to get out of here? I'm, I'm kind of worried ... "

"I know. I am too. We can't all help worrying about me," Anna stated, cupping her own face and sighing, "It is, after all, such a beautiful face ... "

"No; I meant about Catlin. She is too fragile to be left alone. She could, like .. die of sadness?"

The redhead was silent before bursting out into laughter, "HER? DIE! WAHAHAHAHA - Yes, that is a serious problem."

Raoul stared at them in silence. These strange women .. in strange clothes .. with strange accents and a strange mannerism ... He turned and sprinted off into the dark.

Anna finally calmed down enough to turn over to see that the man was gone. The cat stood there, staring. She frowned. "That .. that .. "

"He's gone," her companion stated.

" .. THAT POO-HEAD! AARRRGGH!" She turned and raised her foot to kick the wall but she stopped quickly, "No. Bad idea... bad... " She sighed and shook her head. "That mean, ugly man left us here ... TO DIE." Her voice got deeper and rougher. "Ugh."

Briana patted her friend's shoulder and smiled weakly, "It's all right. We'll find a way out of here."

"You're not very reassuring."

"How do you mean?"

"First of all because I can hear it in your voice."

"Wha?"

"No, that- that was a lie. But, you ... you ... "

"I .. I .. what?"

"You ... you're pinching me!"

"Oh!" The African-American girl pulled her hand back, "Sorry!" She went to pat her friend's shoulder to apologize but decided not to, laughing a bit. "I guess I'm just nervous."

Anna stood up: "Great, thanks; _that's_ reassuring."

"Sorry. Let's get back home."

"Yeah, sure."

They turned and walked down the path which Raoul had appeared (and disappeared). They hoped that it would lead to a way out. As they walked, they pondered how Erik had gotten out. He couldn't have gone down the path Rat-owl had gone down without running into him; there had to have been a secret passage. Somewhere.

They just weren't in the mood to look for it. Tsk, tsk, tsk. Lazy .. But, I suppose it was best; after all, curiosity killed the cat.

"Heh, good thing Cat's not here with us," Briana said suddenly.

"Why's that?"

"I .. dunno. I just got this strange urge to say so .. like a weird metaphor was placed in my mind that had to do with her nickname .. Hmm."

"Hmm, indeed," Anna began. She sighed, "Well, whatever; Cat not being here is why we're stuck! If she were here then maybe we'd get home.."

"Or maybe we'd NEVER get home."

"What do you mean?"

"She likes this Erik dude, right?"

"Yeah, man," the redhead said, channeling Hudson from "Aliens" (which is on today, June 25th!).

" ... Right, well," Briana inhaled, "if she does really like him, then think about it .. this is a dangerous place for her."

"Huh?" Anna was lost.

"One: she'd bring us here, fall in love and then be trapped forever, leaving us without knowledge of how to get out."

"... hmm."

"Two: she could fall in love and try to follow him and get us even MORE lost ... and then we'd be.. well, lost."

"Mhm."

"Three: he could take advantage of her - "

"Ewwie."

" - not like that! I mean, he could take advantage of her love for him and then trick her into tricking us ... "

" .. uh, okay."

"Four: - "

"Wait, how many of these are there!"

"... I'm not sure."

"... carry on."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

" ... well, four: she could meet that Christy lady - "

"Christine."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah .. Stephen King book." She did a nod, a wink and used her fist to double pound her chest, "respect."

" ... anyways, she could meet her, fly into a jealous rage - "

"HAHAHAHA! CATLIN! A JEALOUS RAGE! YEAH RIGHT! I'D SOONER KISS AIZEN - and that's sayin' a lot."

"CAN I CONTINUE, _PLEASE_?"

"Whoa, just take it easy man. ... I mean, yes .. ma'am ... " Anna shrunk back into a tiny ball. "Sorry."

Briana exhaled sharply, "Thanks - NOW, _she could meet her, fly into a jealous rage and kill her or all of us!_" Her scream-y voice echoed down the hall and back towards them. She panted heavily, glaring in front of her.

Anna was pressed up against the wall, shaking. "Yeah. Totally," she said in a tiny, squeaky voice.

The black-haired girl sighed and smiled. "Sorry ~ "

"Creepy."

"What was that?"

"Tee hee, nothing."

So the two - one burnt out and angry, the other scared, yet happy - skipped down into the dark, damp and depressing hallway that wound around the underground of the Opera House, never to be heard of again ...

Just kidding. No, seriously, they have to get back somehow or else this is the last chapter. And it's not. It's just not, okay?

**somewhere else ... aka, the house in which they left in the first chapter**

Catlin sat on the couch in silence, watching the TV. Somewhere between the open portal and running into the glass, the DVD player had been turned off. The screen was black and no music played. She sighed and pulled her legs up onto the couch. She hated begin along in the house. It was like a scary horror movie that she had been sucked into.

She flipped through her notebook until she reached the page where her list had been scribbled down.

_1. Find Erik_

_2. Confess love for Erik (to Erik)_

_3. Hopefully not get rejected because of Christine_

_4. Try not to get too heartbroken over it, since I will most likely be kicked out_

_5. Go home_

Yes, well, that was HER list. Briana had helped with A list, but that wasn't it. No, she wouldn't have let her put that; she wasn't going to let Catlin be a downer her whole life. A wishy-washy, goody-two-shoed, kind-hearted baby with no real backbone. Never! Unfortunately, her efforts hadn't worked. Catlin was still like a small child who needed her mother nearby; Briana was pretty much a mother figure. Not that she was old enough to be her mom, she was just kind and caring and nice and sweet; in short, she was like a mom.

She sighed heavily and thought over what she _really_ would have done, should she have actually made it through the magical TV with Bri & Anna. She wouldn't confess anything to him; the only thing she'd be able to say would be "Ah" and then she's swoon, fainting immediately. She was the nervous type.

Pushing her long brunette bangs out of her face, she clutched her now closed notebook to her chest. Oh, if only things would work out right. Yes, the mysterious masked man did belong to Christine (No! He did not! She was a horrible singer! Catlin was better!), and she could not bring herself to destroy their unusual relationship, not even in a fanfiction.

So, with a sad and heavy heart, she stood up from the couch and turned, expecting to see no one standing just behind her ... (Jeez, that's not obvious.)

When she looked up she shrieked and fell back, nearly hitting the TV stand.

"Who are you!"

The man stood there in silence. He walked around the couch and stood in front of her, "I am here to help you!"

Her eyes widened. "Oh my gosh ..."

"What?"

"You're from the IRS, aren't you?"

"The what?"

"LIARS! YOU CAN'T HELP ME! OH, THE LOANS! OH, OH, THE MONEY! I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE TRUSTED YOU!" She turned and covered her eyes, weeping. "BECAUSE OF YOU, I'VE HAD TO EAT DIRT CHEESEBURGERS FOR LIFE!" Sobbing, she cried, "I don't even _like_ cheeseburgers..."

"Um. I am not from the .. 'I am ess'?" He sounded uncertain, but continued anyway, "I am - "

The short man did not get to finish before Catlin jumped to her feet, "Oh, well, then, um, please forget everything I said about the IRS..."

"Forget what?"

"The .. oh, ahaha. I get it .. " she snorted, "Good one ... ?"

"I am .. Gaston Leroux!"

" ... what."

"I said, 'I am .. Gaston Leroux!' " This time he pointed one of his pudgy fingers into the air as if triumphantly winning something. Catlin said nothing, just stared. This short fat man was .. M. Gaston Leroux? _The_ M. Gaston Leroux? The one who wrote Phantom of the Opera? The one who recounted the tales of Christine (blegh) and Erik (hooray!)? And Christine's father? (Catlin had searched "Madame" on her dictionary on her computer and under it was a book title written by a Gustave Flaubert. Oh, what an unfortunate name.)(1)

"... Mademois - "

Catlin, needless to say as she was, in fact, a weak-hearted young girl and easily disappointed, fainted.

Leroux, or at least the man who claimed to be Leroux (hey, if the Phantom ain't dead, then why should M. Leroux be?), just - as was his, um, nature? - stared.

Pft. Useless.

**end of part two**

(1) It's true. I just did, so I added that. Haha.

How come "Gustave" isn't a name/word, but "Flaubert" is?


	3. I can not believe she listened! LEROUX!

6/27/10

Since I have utterly neglected to post this on the other two installments of this insane and ridiculous title, I will have to assume it is known to others, as well as to myself .. but, please, carry on .. but know that ..

_Phantom of the Opera belongs to M. Leroux (though he is not dead, he is in my living room ... ) and not to me. I would love to own Erik for myself ... but I would have nagging phans bugging me day and night, without an end. Then there would those who would try to steal him, change him and make him strange, all without my consent .. and they would do something stupid with him, so I do not wish to own Erik - as I would also have to deal with Christine and her face. _

_Besides, it's MUCH TOO FUN RUNNING OFF WITH SOMEONE ELSE'S COPYRIGHT. _

_Speaking of which, I suppose that Erik now belongs to Andrew Lloyd Webber. Ain't that a shame? _

I had a lot of fun writing this!

**beginning of part three**

To be completely and utterly honest, Briana and Anna weren't their real names. It was Aevery Cornwall and Elys (pronounced Elise) McCormick. And her name wasn't Catlin. It was Princess Honeycomb XVII. But most people just called her "Bee". Yes, I had lied. I had to lie. Who would believe those other names? But they will stay the same .. as to not confuse anyone ...

So Briana and Anna (really Aevery and Elys) made their way down the black corridor, turning and twisting until it felt like they were walking over a pretzel. The only difference to that was that the corridor didn't smell like a soft and delicious salt-covered bread-type food. It smelled like water. And death. And feet.

Lol, jk.

"Briana," Anna said, tugging at her own red hair with anxiety, "I don't like the dark. This is really creepy. I want to go home."

"Yeah, me too .. I can't miss Naruto Shippudden ep. 34 (created by Masashi Kishimoto (c))!"

" ... has that even come out yet?"

"Um, it's been over a year since it started .. so .. yeah?"

"Hmm. Interesting ... "

Briana sighed, her shoulders hunching. "It's really very sad ... us being stuck here."

" ... I wonder what Cat's doing?"

"Right now?"

"Yeah, RIGHT NOW."

"Um, maybe eating?"

"Yeah. She barely eats .. when you look, but when you turn away ... she's a little porker!" Anna laughed hysterically, placing her hands over her shoulders in a Boohaha motion much like Rukia Kuchiki (BLEACH (c) Tite Kubo).

**back home**

Catlin, locked in her bathroom, scared out of her wits, felt like someone was laughing at her expense. .. someone ... close to her. ... and it was about something she did ... such as eating.

She sighed.

Oh, unrelated-sisterly instincts. Anna was laughing at her. Again. Curse her. Oh, the shame; all dignity, down the toilet! (And I'm not just saying that because she was hiding out in her shower.)

She mentally slapped Anna then immediately regretted it, hoping she wouldn't find out .. telepathically.

**back in Paris(?) **

Anna let out a grunt and threw herself across the hall, slamming into a wall.

"What the heck!" Bri shrieked, clasping her hands together at her face. "What are you doing!"

Anna let out a muffled sob. Or was it a laugh? She pulled away from the wall, her eyes crossed and dizzy. She fell back and Briana tried to catch her. Mega trust fall fail. The younger girl fell to the ground and hit her head. Again.

"Oh my gosh! I am sooo sorry! What .. what were you doing!"

The redhead stared up into the black room, not seeing anything. "I think I'm blind."

" ... open your eyes."

" ... I knew that."

**back home, again**

Catlin sat huddled in her bathtub, hugging her knees to her chest and whimpering. She could hear the calls of the Frenchman standing outside her door.

"Please! I can help you!"

She bit her lower lip, her eyes large and round like a puppy-dog. She was scared. Never before had she been left alone in the house; and never before had she been left alone with a stranger ...in the house. And this man claimed to be someone who died decades ago! Well, technically, if her friends had been able to walk through their TV then she had no right to question if the creator of the passage was alive or not. But she didn't care. TECHNICALITIES WEREN'T ESSENTIAL AT A TIME LIKE THIS!

"I know how to assist you, young Madame!"

"I'm not a Madame," she sobbed. "I'm not even dating!"

"Mademoiselle," he replied, "I apologize for the brief lapse in judgment .. it is just that you are so beautiful, I figured surely a man had your heart! A ring on your finger ..."

She glanced down to her left hand where her black mood ring sat, rather odd looking.

"I am not married. It's a mood ring."

"I can tell by your voice you are not in a pleasant mood - why must you use a ring to tell others?"

" ... am I really pretty?"

"Yes! By far, the most lovely woman I have ever set my eyes on!"

(Okay, stop laughing. We've been bashing her so far. She needs love too! Besides she wanted to go with Erik in the first place! NOT BRI & ANNA!)

" ... hmm," Cat considered this. Should she open the door to this strange man who, not only was hundreds of years older than her, but was also complimenting her? It was kind of creepy. But not creepy enough to warn this young, tender heart about the dangers of online dating sites! ... She leapt from the tub and dashed across the three feet of tile to the door. She unlocked it and pulled open the door to see the short man.

"YES! I WILL MARRY YOU!" she shrieked. When he looked at her in a mixture of horror and confusion, she stood up straight and cleared her throat. "Show me how to get my friends back .. dude."

"... Le-_roux_ ... not .. _dude_ ... "

"Yeah, whatever, man."

" ... who is this - "

"JUST SHOW ME ALREADY!"

He hastily grabbed her wrist making her pull back. "Do not worry! I know that way! For I .. wrote the book!"

"What! NOO!"

"Yes, it is true, mademoiselle." He then threw Cat over his shoulder and sprinted (as fast as he could) back out towards the living room. Instead of setting her down and instructing her on how to get through the portal into the Phantom World, he tightly held onto her and geared up.

"Please pardon my grabbing you in such a manner," he began, "but I must know that you make it through!"

"HUH?"

"I said, 'I am going to go with you'."

" ... no!"

The man ignored her plea and took off towards the TV at a super fast pace.

"Wait! You have to play the CD! YOU HAVE TO PLAY THE CD! Or we'll never make it through!"

"Do not worry; your distress is not making for polite conversation!"

"Polite conversation? Are you out of your mind!"

"Possibly!" He laughed maniacally, much unlike the Leroux she had imagined, and sprinted towards the TV. Gosh, it was taking a long time getting there. Finally he reached the television and barreled into it. The girl let out a shriek, afraid that it'd come toppling over on her, along with the man. No, she wasn't afraid of the tele landing on him. She was afraid of him landing on her. But, despite her very rational fear, it did not happen. She had her eyes squinted closed and didn't open them until she heard the man speak:

"We have arrived, mademoiselle."

" ... " She opened one eye then closed it to open the other. Deciding that it was moderately safe, she opened both eyes and looked around the fairly dark room. Leroux dropped her to her feet. She felt water seep through her black and orange striped socks. Why hadn't she worn shoes? Looking around, she saw that the room was very ... unique.

"Well, mademoiselle," M. Leroux began, bowing his head and taking Cat's hand into his own. "It is time."

"For what?"

He looked up at her and laughed. She was kinda creeped out by that. "For the wedding, of course!"

"What."

"Yes, you said so yourself! You would marry me!"

" ... I .. I .. I wasn't - "

"Do not worry! It is all prepared!"

" ... yeah, you ARE insane."

"Do not insult your future husband!"

"I ain't marrying you! You're old and grody!"

"I beg your pardon?"

"I said, 'you're old and grody!'. That's what I said."

" ... I do not ... anyway!"

"They had the word 'anyway' in 1911?"

" ... We shall go on with the wedding."

"Yeah, um, no thanks."

"But you have to."

"Why?"

"You said you would."

"IT WAS A JOKE. Okay? A joke. I was kidding! I wasn't serious!"

"But you are dressed for it."

"What?" She looked down to see she was in a creamy-white lace wedding dress. She felt a long veil brush against her arms. " ... what? _What?_"

"Yes! It is all arranged!" Laughing crazily again, the man grabbed Cat by her wrist and pulled her along behind him, all the way down the hall. He turned here and there; he seemed to know where he was going. That was strange, considering Cat had been obsessing over PoTO for the past three months and still couldn't figure out the hallways. Of course, there wasn't any sort of visual aid .. aside from the movies.

Finally the man pulled them through a passage and out into a room. There was an altar where a man in a priest's outfit stood with a table that held three candles. Unity candles.

"Wow," Cat said, staring with a deadpan.

"You are pleased?"

" .. ummm .. you're really creepy."

"DO NOT INSULT THE MAN WHO CREATED YOU LOVER!"

"Ohmigosh, I'm sorry!"

Leroux pulled Cat behind him down a narrow path made of stones toward the table. On either side of the stone squares was water. A lot of water. I mean, _a lot_. Like a lake, basically. Around the dark waters, which creeped the girl out, were walls. They rose up, made out of stone. High above them were areas where people could sit, much like Opera Boxes, all of which were embellished with red velvet and gold chairs. Torches were lit all around the circular room, giving it a creepy glow. Behind the table and altar were large rocks that jutted out of the water. Some rose up nearly 10 feet. And beyond them was a black wrought-iron gate that opened in the middle; it was in a fairly intricate design. She couldn't see anything behind the gate besides more rocks that created the floor and a blackness that she assumed was a cave.

M. Leroux walked awkwardly, jutting one leg forward, then the other. It was like he was trying to walk in a wedding/army type of way and Cat was being dragged along behind him, constantly hitting her shoulder against his head. Finally they reached the table where the Priest lit the large, short candle in the middle. For some reason, the wax cylinder reminded her of Gaston Leroux. She snorted at this thought then cleared her throat. How unladylike.

"The vows," the priest said, his voice low and raspy, as if he had been talking all of his life. She realized that he resembled M. Poligny. "We shall begin ... short."

"Huh?"

"Do you, M. Gaston Leroux, take this woman as your lawfully wedded wife?"

_Lawfully?_ Cat thought. _I thought it was awfully... this really IS awful, though!_

"I do."

"And do you, Catl - "

"Cat."

" .. Cat .. ... " He paused.

She smiled. "I don't have a last name."

"Good thing I do!" Gaston replied.

Ugh. Gaston. What a ghastly name!

"Do you, Cat, take this man - "

"If you could call him that."

He pinched her.

"Owwie!"

" - as your lawfully wedded husband?"

"NO!"

"YES, she does.. she's shy." The man gave a quick wink to her. She shuddered.

"Gross."

"Now .. the rings."

"Oh, the rings... " Leroux replied, letting go of Cat's arm to place his chubby hands in his head. "That is what I have misplaced!"

"Too bad, so sad. Maybe next month we can .. uh, talk this over?"

"NO! We will get marri ... " he fell silent as his eyes caught something.

"What? Stop looking at me ..!"

He grabbed her hand and shoved it toward the Priest, "Look! She already has a ring! I .. I gave it to her, so I would not forget the wedding rings!"

"Liar!" she gasped, "I wouldn't wear a ring from you!"

"Not even if it was .. this!" He grabbed a diamond ring from his back pocket and shoved it in her face.

"Ooh. Pretty."

"Oh, I guess I did have the wedding band all along," he laughed before becoming utterly serious, "Let's get this on."

" ... uh."

"...the rings," the priest repeated.

"Oh, yeah." Leroux grabbed her hand forcefully and bent all fingers down except for the ring finger. "Just relax!"

"No! I'll never listen to you again! You ARE from the IRS, aren't you!"

"No!" He slowly slid the ring over her fingernail and then the first knuckle. "This is for your own good!"

"HELP ME! SOMEBODY PLEASE!" Her voice echoed in the large cavern of a room.

M. Leroux laughed loudly again, "No one will hear you! EVER!"

Just as she was about to give up, she heard a splash. She looked over quickly to see a few stray rocks fall into the lake, the water rippling around it.

"Haha, you thought it was your saviour!" Gaston laughed obnoxiously. Man, she was about to smack him. "It would be nice, for you, yes, but it is not to happen! He will never come! I have created him to love Christine too much!"

"Not so fast!"

She gasped dramatically and looked up towards one of the 'boxes'. A shadowed figure stood on the edge of the stone railing, his black cape fluttering around him like in a comic book, despite the fact that there was no wind in the underground cave.

"There!" she cried, pointing up towards him. Well, that wasn't obvious. Gaston turned his head and stared in horror.

"NO!"

"YES!" Cat shrieked, jumping up and down excitedly. She was making so much motion that Gaston couldn't hold her hand anymore. He slipped on the stone and fell into the water with a loud splash. The diamond ring flew into the air and landed on the large, lit candle. It caught on fire and burnt to a crisp.

"Wow, didn't think that was possible." Cat didn't even care that she was soaking wet. The man on the railing must have been holding a rope of some kind for he swung down and passed over the water, the tail of his cape barely skimming the surface. Before she could even blink, he had scooped her up, up into the air, and landed on a railing on the opposite side of the cavern. The masked stranger held Cat bridal style while overlooking the altar and lake. The entire thing was so epic, the girl could barely speak.

"Curse you, Phantom!" Leroux gasped as he pulled himself onto the stone slab with great difficulty. "I know where you live!"

"You do not!"

"I do! ... I know your father, as well!"

"You do not; my father is dead!"

"No, Phantom ... " Leroux said, standing up. Water dripped from his slightly bald head and, well, everywhere else. The stones were becoming soaked. Cat was surprised they didn't sink. The author held his hand in a fist and stared intently at the Phantom, "I _am_ your father!"

"NOOO!"

"YESSS!"

Before Gaston could say anything else, the distraught man flew off into the darkness, carrying the young girl in the wedding dress.

It was one heck of a day for all of them!

**end of part three**

DON'T GET TOO EXCITED ABOUT IT. HOHOHO, YOU HAVE TO WAIT TO READ THE NEXT PART ... TO GET MY EVIL, DIABOLICAL PLAN!

Also, the place I described at the wedding .. I have no idea where that is. I've never seen the movie or finished the book, so please forgive me! I have a wild imagination ...

OHMIGOSH! EWW! I WAS TYPING AND THEN I SAW SOMETHING BLACK MOVE ON MY COMPUTER, RIGHT NEXT TO MY RIGHT HAND .. AND I LOOKED .. AND SAW A HUGE SPIDER! I DIDN'T WANT TO KILL IT CUZ OF ERIK, BUT IT WAS SCARY! WHERE DID IT COME FROM? THE CEILING! MY HAND!


End file.
